A MESSAGE FROM Liv Runs New York City!! -- Minding Your Mind -- #Livetotell
Get ready to read. It is lengthy but every word is worthy.
Thank you for visiting my fundraising page for the NYC Marathon that supports team Minding Your Mind. Minding Your Mind is dedicated to ending stigma and destructive behaviors associated with mental health illnesses, moving away from a crisis-based response to prevention through education. They use the power of storytelling to provide evidence-based education on mental health challenges to their audiences.
I am a mom of two girls, who suffered from severe postpartum depression. I want to be part of ending the stigma of mental health illnesses. I come before you all to share my story (most do not know this!) and how therapy, medication, running and community changed my life.
When we moved to New Hampshire in 2015, I was pregnant with our second child. My husband was regularly traveling or leaving the house at 4:00am, I worked until about midnight four days a week and really didn't know anyone. After our youngest was born and I was back to work at 8 weeks, the demands on me as a mother became too much. I was not sleeping, my hormones were unstable and I missed being independent. The best way I could describe how I was feeling to my therapist was, "I'm tired of being tired." I was empty.
My depression became regular thoughts of suicide. It took me 7 months of having these thoughts to finally call my OBGYN. I didn't talk to anyone about it prior. The OBGYN office saw me immediately. They wanted to send me to the ER but I dug my heels in because as a previous ER nurse, I continued to think, "Oh, I'm not that bad..." Instead, a therapist met with me at the office that day, and we made an immediate plan that I also complained about -- although it was 100% appropriate ;). Within that same week, I was quickly referred for medication that I'm still taking today (no shame!). Shortly after, I found a therapist who gave me hope. I never walked away from our weekly sessions feeling defeated and could tell by the smile on her face that I was going to be okay.
It took many more months to feel "normal" again. In 2019, I found my love of running, which remains one of my key components to my overall well being. I was convinced to start running when one of my best friends, named Laura, from nursing school at Ohio State, said, "I'm only running a half marathon in New Hampshire if you run with me." Running changed my life. It is steady, it is refreshing, it is challenging, it is rewarding, it is humbling and it brings me joy. However, sometimes running brings me more aches and pains than I would prefer! The group women that I invited myself to run with that year are simply the icing on the cake! They are the reason that a 4:40am alarm clock is mildly tolerable.
I will be crossing the finish line with Laura who introduced
me to running. I’ll be celebrating every step that I (and my family!)
took along the way to help me be well again. Many thanks to my husband
who is there day in and day out and has loved me effortlessly in
this journey.
My heart aches for those who are in the valleys. My hope is that everyone will know that the lows do not have to remain. My mantra is, "It is okay to not be okay, but you don't have to stay there." Therapy can be hard but beautiful. Finding the right medication can be hard but beautiful. The most important thing is to know that there is a light on the other side and to be there for those who can't see that light all the time. You have to take the steps forward for healing. People do not heal on their own. We need one another. Please don't wait as long as I did to get help if you need it.
The best part of my recovery is that I can confidently say how grateful I am that my kids have ME as a mom. And I LOVE being their mom. They give me butterflies. They fill my soul more than ever before. However, they also know that other things need to fill my soul too. Our house is full of talking about all emotions and I hope that it forever remains a safe place for them.
Now that I have two children, one who will be entering middle school, I want them know the importance of mental health and wellness. I want them to learn prevention and I want their teachers to know not only how to respond during a crisis, but that they would be aware of creating a healthy environment for our children to talk.
Thank you for your generous donation in support of Team Minding Your Mind! The majority of Minding Your Mind’s programs are provided on a donate-as-able basis to the schools or organizations requesting them. Each individual program costs Minding Your Mind approximately $500 plus overhead. While hosting groups are invited to make a donation to Minding Your Mind, they do not decline presentations due to an inability to pay. Because of this policy, most of Minding Your Mind’s financing is derived from fundraising events, personal donations, and charitable grants.Your donation can change — and save — lives. Thank you. Visit their website to learn more and bring a program to your community: www.mindingyourmind.org
All the love. Be well.
Liv
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